


Everyone's Thinking It

by GretchenSinister



Category: Rise of the Guardians (2012)
Genre: Multi, Pre-Threesome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-18
Updated: 2020-02-18
Packaged: 2021-02-27 20:14:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 690
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22781566
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GretchenSinister/pseuds/GretchenSinister
Summary: Original Prompt: "Whenever they fight, Pitch and Jack act all flirty (talking really close to each other, eye sex and what not), even when the other guardians are around, which makes everything a bit awkward for them.(Sorry for the horrible engrish, I hope you understand)"Turns out that all of Pitch’s puns or innuendos are unintentional. Jack and Sandy’s aren’t. It’s a little awkward for a bit, but Sandy’s got a solution.
Relationships: Jack Frost/Pitch Black/Sanderson Mansnoozie
Kudos: 22
Collections: RotG Threesomes Short Fics





	Everyone's Thinking It

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted on Tumblr on 5/24/2014.

“Jack! Come back here at once, or I’ll—”  
  
“Or you’ll what, Pitch?” Jack calls, hovering just out of the range of Pitch’s scythe. “With that kind of weapon, I don’t know that I even need to get that close!”  
  
Pitch growls in frustration, heaving his scythe skyward. The blade shifts as he lifts it, aligning with the shaft instead of resting perpendicular to it. “If it’s a longer weapon you want, it’s a longer weapon you’ll have!”  
  
“Careful, now!” Jack calls, swooping underneath the scythe and up to Pitch’s elbow. “I never said I would stay away,” he says directly into Pitch’s ear.   
  
Pitch startles, letting the scythe dissolve, and lunges at Jack, tackling him to the ground.  
  
“Come on now,” Jack says as they grapple. “How could I resist?” He flips Pitch over, shoving him into the snow. “What weapon are you going to use now, your majesty?”  
  
Pitch bares his teeth at Jack, tensing for his next attack, when he looks over away from Jack and over his shoulder. Jack watches Pitch’s expression change from rage to pure consternation. “Certainly not!” Pitch says indignantly, and somewhat nonsensically, Jack thinks. In his brief moment of confusion, Pitch throws him off, sending him to land ungracefully in a snowdrift.  
  
When he rights himself, Jack sees Pitch approaching Sandy, working himself up into a good harangue. “Sandy! You stop that right now!”  
  
All Jack can tell that Sandy’s doing is signing at Pitch while sitting cross-legged on his cloud. He’s using the kind of curlicue symbols that Jack’s seen him use a few times before, the ones that only Bunny seems to understand—and now Pitch, too, apparently. “What do my nightmares have to do with this? I had—did you not see the scythe, _literally_ there? And I’m sure Jack wasn’t thinking anything like…” Pitch trails off and Sandy signs faster, smiling over at Jack and using a few symbols Jack can recognize among the rest. Alarmingly, one of them is a heart.  
  
“Well, aren’t you going to reply?” Pitch asks, spinning towards Jack.  
  
“Love to, but I don’t exactly know what I’d be replying to. Sorry Sandy,” Jack says. “I’ll work on it. So, want to translate, Pitch? I’m sure Sandy’d give you a good lashing if you make stuff up.”  
  
Sandy nods eagerly and Pitch makes a face. “The Sandman has implied that you were not referring entirely to literal battles and weapons during our fight, and also that I was well aware of this fact and,” he sighs, “flirting back. Which is not true. Now, Jack, what do you have to say to that?”  
  
A blush creeps over Jack’s cheeks. “Uh…Sandy, was it really that obvious?”  
  
“What!” Pitch exclaims, while Sandy forms further signs. Pitch’s eyes widen as he watches, and his mouth is hanging open by the time Sandy’s done.  
  
Sandy obligingly reaches over to push it closed, but Pitch jumps away, waving him off.  
  
He clears his throat. “Sandy says that yes, it was that obvious. I disagree, but—ah—I may have missed one or two details in the past. Sandy says that you were obvious because there was no real reason to seek me out to fight, which I do agree with, and that he decided to come with you because he also enjoys the…excuse…of a battle. I suppose that would explain some things,” Pitch admits.  
  
“Okay, then.” Jack sends Sandy a sheepish grin. “So you understand.”  
  
“That’s good, because I don’t,” Pitch says crossly. “If you wanted—Sandy, what do you mean, unapproachable?”  
  
“Sandy,” Jack says, “Should I—I mean, do you want me to stop—or…”  
  
Sandy grins slowly and makes just a few signs.  
  
“Sandy notes the simplest solution,” Pitch says faintly.  
  
“Yeah, I got that one.” A mischievous smile lands on his face as he nods. “You’re right, Sandy. There’s enough of him to go around.”  
  
“What!” Pitch looks wildly from one to the other. “This isn’t how a battle ends! Not in reality.”  
  
“In dreams, though?” Jack suggests.  
  
Pitch curses softly, but doesn’t struggle, as strands of golden dreamsand begin to twine around his shoulders.

**Author's Note:**

> Tags and Comments from Tumblr:
> 
> #it's okay Pitch I'm sure all normal villains dream about having the hero make sweet hot love to them after they're defeated#I'm sure
> 
> whentheoceanmetsky said: I’ll never get tired of Pitch being a dork. Never ever. And Sandy and Jack teaming up always seems to end in some type of hilarity and I’m totally okay with that.
> 
> tejoxys said: These three make me so happy. <3


End file.
